"Amoore100" (amoore100)
08/20/2015 at 20:44 • Filed to: Oppo Review, Pencilopnik, School, PaperMate
6
18|
"Amoore100" (amoore100)
08/20/2015 at 20:44 • Filed to: Oppo Review, Pencilopnik, School, PaperMate | 6
| 18 |
Seeing as it’s that time of year again for all of us young Oppos to return to school, I decided to ‘celebrate’ by doing a review on a product used commonly among the thousands of students worldwide: the PaperMate Write Bros. Chances are, if you’re American, you’ve written with one of these pencils at least once. They are one of the most ubiquitous modern pencil designs out there today, and so it seemed only fit that it would receive the highest honor of an Oppo review.
Full Disclaimer: PaperMate wanted me to write with this pencil so badly that they first sold it wholesale to a local retailer from which my mom purchased the package at a back to school sale nearly three years ago since when the package has sat in our storage closet until I had the need for a new pencil this school year.
Look at that !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! plastic trim on the bumpers!
Exterior: (6/10)
This pencil, while not particularly handsome or good looking, does have a very distinctive style characterized by the body ridges carved into the overall color barrel portion of the pencil. The ends of the pencil are colored in grey plastic which provides a nice contrast and defines the body lines well. The rear clip has a swoopy shape, coming down from the eraser and meeting the side curvaceously and elegantly. The entire composition is relatively sleek, though I myself prefer the staid looks of the BIC Matic...
Interior: (DNF)
I couldn’t find one.
Acceleration: (7/10)
This pencil is actually quite speedy, accelerating at a rate of 9.8 m/s/s when falling from a high surface. Disregarding air resistance and terminal velocity, it should reach 60 mph in under 3 seconds, thus beating out many supercars and hypercars in the process. The only issue occurs when the pencil has reached its destination, namely the floor, at which point it seems to stall out and cannot move under its own power any longer.
Braking: (0/10)
It stops, but only when it hits things, usually the ground.
Shown here behaving relatively well in terms of ride and handling.
Ride: (5/10)
Depending on the state of the graphite coming out of it, the ride is either extremely smooth or horribly jarring. Some moments there occurs that time of absolute harmony where everything is smoothly gliding across the paper. Other moments occur when the graphite is sharp and succeeds in doing nothing but ripping into the paper. The ride gets quite rough then...
Handling: (5/10)
Like the ride, the handling largely depends on the state of graphite being extruded. When the ride is soft, the pencil handles like a dream, swiftly marking every letter with ease and confidence. When the ride is rough, every letter is a struggle to make a mark on the sheet and the results are often too pale to read or a hole in the paper.
Gearbox: (6/10)
It extrudes graphite. That’s about it. It does do it quite well though, always catching a piece early on so that you don’t have to wait for the clutch engagement to occur. It can sometimes be rough or awkward to extrude graphite in a hurry, but the system doesn’t break easily and stands up well to hard usage.
At least since there are only four major components, if anything gets jammed fixing it is a matter of seconds.
Toys: (2/10)
Like any of its competitors, the PaperMate comes standard with an eraser, three pieces of graphite and a myriad of creature comforts including push-button graphite advancement and nothing else. There is nothing fancy here at all, no shaking graphite advancement, no graphite adjustment lock, no extra grip material, no fancy tip. It just writes.
Audio: (-2/10)
If you’re like any other high schooler, the sound of pencils against paper brings back terrible memories of timed writings and tedious math tests. In addition, the graphite advancement system often shifts with a terrible “clunk” sound and sometimes squeaks when used often. It will likely not bring any joy to your day, that’s for sure.
Value: (7/10)
If I recall correctly, these go for around 7.5 cents each ($4 for a 30 pack) on back to school sale, which is a pretty damn good deal in any case. However, its spartan features lend me to believe that the BIC Matic (which I prefer) is a better deal at only 7.4 cents each ($3.50 for a 26 pack, plus an extra BIC Velocity for free. Thus, I really can’t give the Papermate more than 7/10 in value.
Reliability: (10/10)
Since this pencil was disqualified from an interior evaluation, it gets a score based on reliability over the years that I have used this model, and I must say that it gets an undisputed 10/10. Many other pencils have come and gone, some with broken mechanisms, others with split plastic barrels, but a PaperMate Write Bros. nearly never goes wrong. Even the similar BIC Matic has reliability issues in the older ones where nothing would happen when graphite was put in, but for these PaperMates, all you need is some graphite and you’re all set to write to your heart’s content.
Total: (46/100)
Engine: Gravity
Power: Nope
Transmission: 1-speed manual graphite advancer
0-60 Time: <3 s
Top Speed: Incredible
Drivetrain: Front graphite drive
Curb Weight: ~10 g
MPG: 1 graphite/600 words
Type of Fuel: Unleaded 0.7 mm graphite
MSRP: 7.5¢ new
Bonus:
With the removal of the color tube, the plebeian PaperMate suddenly becomes a racing pencil, optimized for lightweight and speed.
JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 20:49 |
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Beautiful review
Reminded me I need to buy some supplies since I start Monday!
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Amoore100
> JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
08/20/2015 at 20:51 |
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Of course. Only the best for Oppo; we plan these to help each other remember things! ;)
Jordaneer, The Mountaineer Man
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 20:53 |
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Holy cow this is great!!! What about where they graphite goes for the interior? If that counts, it would be extremely spartan interior, which I guess is good for racing, I must say, this is one of my favorite oppo reviews of all time!!!
PS graphite is pure carbon, and carbon brakes are the best, we the brakes would probably beamazing (if it had them).
jkm7680
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 20:54 |
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I hate those things.
Also note that the body of the pen shatters easily and makes quite good shanks for the price.
Rico
> JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
08/20/2015 at 20:58 |
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One notebook and one pen is all you need!
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Amoore100
> Jordaneer, The Mountaineer Man
08/20/2015 at 20:59 |
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Thanks for the enthusiasm! (And yes, we should probably come up with some sort of graphite braking system for this...)
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Amoore100
> jkm7680
08/20/2015 at 21:00 |
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Never had one break on me yet...and shanks? I must be missing something...
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JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 21:07 |
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Unrelated: I think my dad lost his mind and he might be trading his S60 in... for an XC60
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Jordaneer, The Mountaineer Man
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 21:07 |
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Lol
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Amoore100
> JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
08/20/2015 at 21:13 |
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That sucks but at least he’s still staying true to Volvo! And technically the XC60 is a wagon, so actually it might be a good thing after all... My grandma wants a small SUV/Crossover because she is an artist but getting up in her years and so wants a high load sill where she won’t have to bend over as in her Civic...she was talking about getting a used CR-V but I’m thinking about a used XC60 instead. She loves Ikea design and so would likely love the looks, and she always complains about how her Civic feels slow, and so a T5 or T6 would totally fix that problem...the only issue I see is perhaps finding one on CPO so that if anything goes wrong she won’t have to go too far out of pocket to mend it, seeing as her last two cars have been Japanese...keep me updated if he does end up with an XC60, I would like to hear about it and see if it would be right for my grandmother in a few years!
traderQAMobileTestAutomationMobileBoostOn
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 21:21 |
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Oppo needs more silly reviews like this.
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Amoore100
> traderQAMobileTestAutomationMobileBoostOn
08/20/2015 at 21:22 |
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Everyone is welcome to making them ;)
Frank Grimes
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 21:59 |
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I hesitate to stray from my BIC loyalty but I need to know reliability and softness of the graphite before I sign anything.
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Amoore100
> Frank Grimes
08/20/2015 at 22:04 |
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I can review the BIC tomorrow, if you like ;)
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Frank Grimes
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 22:22 |
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be sure to post ringtimes including lead changes.
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Amoore100
> Frank Grimes
08/20/2015 at 22:30 |
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Not sure I entirely understood that...
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JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
> Amoore100
08/20/2015 at 23:17 |
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We might be moving north and he wants awd. And the dealer has a crazy deal on a 2013 T6 AWD with only 13k miles! Its practically new! And those awesome led tail lights!
Oh and just an fyi almodt any used Volvo can become a CPO
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Amoore100
> JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
08/20/2015 at 23:38 |
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Wow, that is an amazing deal...where in the north might you be moving?
Dat ass. On a D4, apparently, because petrol is for losers, says Europe.